So today it hit me so hard (like a tonne of bricks!) that I might be single for the rest of my life. Spouseless and childless.

Not knowing what to do, I did the only thing I knew: I ran to God. I had the opportunity to pray the rosary out loud, in front of the blessed sacrament in the tabernacle. Oh, how lucky I am!

During the rosary, I swung from feeling immense joy being in the presence of the Lord; right up to feeling immense sadness knowing that when I prayed for God’s will to be done, I really might be spouseless and childless for the rest of my earthly life.

I’ve prayed this prayer many times: “Lord, help me to choose you over and over again over any mortal man.” And today, it just hit me so hard, that I had to CHOOSE God, God was giving me the option to CHOOSE Him, to choose joy in light of all the sadness.

There are, after all, more important things to pray about, missions that we have in life, such as praying for the souls in purgatory!

Today, I’ve grown in awareness as to how much my thoughts wander especially when I pray the rosary. Indeed the devil tries to prevent us from praying the rosary because it’s just too too powerful!

Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us.
Immaculate Heart of Mama Mary, pray for us.
Jesus, Your will be done; and help me to choose You again and again over any mortal man.

 

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Nathalie Fernandez

Nathalie Fernandez

Nathalie Rachel Fernandez loves to engage in conversation (especially with strangers!), go on cheap backpacking trips around South-East Asia and make friends in the most random of places. She teaches General Paper at a junior college and she’s passionate about getting young people to adopt an attitude of gratitude and think about life and why we’re all put here on earth. A Roman Catholic revert, she left the faith in folly and came back home to a loving Father. She is pursuing a Certificate of Theology at the Catholic Theological Institute of Singapore, and falling in love with our Lord more and more each day!

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