Have you ever thought about yourself like you think about others?
People can be idiots, prigs, jerks, crazies. People can just get on your nerves, be irresponsible, render service that is completely unacceptable, be shameful excuses for human beings.
We, on the other hand, aren’t poor excuses for human beings. We have excuses. We are above reproach. It wasn’t our fault. We couldn’t have done better if we tried.
Critically examine your life from an outsider’s perspective.
You have certainly said ignorant things to people who knew better. You have certainly acted as if something or somebody were beneath you.
Surely you have been impatient, or rude, or short with others. Perhaps you have some odd ideas, quirks, eccentricities. Haven’t you ever annoyed anybody? Haven’t you ever been a little lazy, and a little lazier, and been late, or not finished, or been truly neglegent? Haven’t you done your job less well than you agreed to, or less diligently than you have tried to make it seem?
And can’t everyone whose pride is not invested in your perfection–everyone who is not you, that is–see right through you and your lame excuses that you cook up so you can sleep at night?
Aren’t you an idiot, a prig, a jerk, a crazy; annoying, irresponsible, unacceptable, a bum, a leech?
Do yourself a favor. Let yourself see right through yourself. Ask for God’s help to see it, and ask for God’s help to fix it. Detach from being good, or right, or kind, or loving, or generous–from having whatever virtue it tickles your fancy to suppose you have–and look yourself straight in the face, as you are, which for all practical purposes is nothing more and nothing less than as you do. Toss out your flattering self-image for the lie that it is. Now live your life in service to God and neighbor, and place all your time, talent, and energy at their disposal.
This takes time, prayer, and patience. But this will break your pride, and, with God’s help, this will break your stony, sinful heart.